Boy am I learning a lot in this journey of being a parent. One major thing, which I’ll dwell on today, is the issue of laziness.
Now, I realize I haven’t gone far in the parenting deal. There are people who are parents of 6-year-olds, 12-year olds, 30-year-olds. So I’m clearly just beginning. I’d heard it before but it hits me now anew pretty much every single day. Parenting is not for the faint of heart, even if you do have an angelic creature. You are molding a spirit, basically. Super daunting when one looks at the big picture, which is why it’s more helpful to take bite-sized chunks instead. What do I mean? Literally take it one day at a time.
I’ve been making all sorts of mistakes in my role. I find that when I perhaps overreacted to something my toddler does, I feel super awful and I return to her, speaking to her heart my apologies. I talk to her as to someone I value and love, telling her the error of my ways and asking for her forgiveness. I’m not one to think that just because she’s that young, she cannot possibly understand what I’m saying. They are spirit beings – they can read the heart of what we say to them. Which is why I’ve been learning to, as I said, speak to her heart.
Well, back to my focus today: laziness. One major thing I’ve found that parenting does not give room for is that. Right from when the child is born, out of sheer exhaustion, there are times that one is tempted to skip corners. The only thing that tends to keep such a one from doing so is love of that child, concern for the child’s safety, and literally, the fear of God! 🙂 haha. Not “fear” of God as you may imagine it, but that inner conscience/nervousness that usually stops most humans from doing foolish things. That’s what I’m talking about. There are times even now when I’m soooo beat, frustrated, and hungry (yep, all of that simultaneously – not to mention my possibly also being emotionally whack in a given moment too) and I crash onto my bed hoping for a few minutes of, not sleep, mind you, but just a reordering of things. A moment of calm. Rest for my soul. Two minutes is usually all I ask for. I’m not usually granted that.
In she comes, with that boundless storm of energy. She fusses, wanting to come up on the bed with me. Great, I think. Maybe we’ll both lie here and think of our lives in silence. Up she gets, and the wriggling begins. Turns out the energy didn’t stop; it just got redirected. To my body, to my bed. She turns to the left, then to the right, kicks her legs in the air, to my belly, thighs, you name it. I then spend the majority of time mentally preparing to ward off painful blows. Then she gets up, trying to dance on same bed. I find it amusing for a second so I laugh along, then I get annoyed because not only won’t it stop, I realize time is flying by and so far I have in no way rested…
Readers, are you exhausted yet just reading this? Lol. Onwards!
So, while lying there, it suddenly hits me that she needs a snack. Before I consider that she may perhaps be able to live without one for today (this is when I reassure myself that I’m still a good mom, and she’s not going to die of starvation), she does a nice poop to ensure that all my hopes of staying in bed are….OUT THE WINDOW.
No. Parenting was never for the faint of heart, nor for the laziest bone. And yet, it’s one of the most beautiful experiences we could be given. In my case, the look of joy when I do give her what she needs, especially if it’s that snack, or a drink of water because I sensed she must be thirsty, is greatly, greatly rewarding. In molding a child’s spirit, it’s those tiny acts of service spread out throughout the day that help form a well-rounded little person who knows beyond reasonable doubt that s/he is fully, totally, and entirely loved.
We wouldn’t have it any other way. 🙂
For you parents out there, this is supposed to be a note of encouragement for you – a solidarity thing. For those of you yet-to-be-someday, this is to let you know that you really can do it! Each day I get through leaves me amazed that I did.
So guys and gals, bite-sized chunks, ok?
While we’re at it, go get you some cookies to munch. All this talk of biting…and chunks.